The theory of us

Dear ______,

I am yours. And I am not yours.

You're the one who got away — there aren't permutations that allow you to be mine — you couldn't have been mine and you should not ever be mine.

You are toxic. You are nostalgia. You are an undying hope for an impossible future. You are trouble, for sure. 

You are mine in my memories, but I am never yours. You don't know binaries, for you are a friend, a lover and everything in between. Even my nemesis. 

You float in and out of my past, present, and future. I can never keep up. You are a fading memory — but the residue still lingers. Between heaven and hell, there is you — the purgatory that I have resigned myself to. 

Yours,

______